Reduce Worry Process
A number of years ago, one of my life coaching clients, let’s call him Larry, worried that his architecture firm might go under. He had been expressing these concerns for quite some time. It affected almost everything he did. Like many of us, Larry was a worrier. I don’t know about you, but I don’t know anyone who wishes they worried more. In that session, I shared with him what I call the Reduce Worry Process.
When I feel myself worrying excessively, besides expressing gratitude for my life, there are three questions I ask myself.
The first is, What is the worst that can happen? Remember worry is an irrational emotion. There is an acronym that reminds me of this truth. F.E.A.R.—False Evidence Appearing Real.
Then I ask myself, How likely is it that what I’m worrying about will happen? This question gets me out of the irrational mode. When you are in the irrational mode you usually imagine the worst-case scenario. This inquiry forces me to detach from what I’m feeling, even if just for a few seconds. Once I’m feeling calmer, I’m ready to explore the likelihood of the particular thing I’m worrying about actually occurring. Usually I come to the conclusion that there is little likelihood it will happen.
The next inquiry I have found quite powerful. Ask yourself what the result would be if everything went your way. Very few of us consider this possibility. In Larry’s situation, because I had heard him express these concerns before, I was more objective. I suggested to him that for all he knew this next year could be his best year yet. I had planted a seed that he hadn’t yet considered. As it turned out, a few new projects that he bid on came in, and he had best year even in a down economy.
When you allow yourself to fully explore and imagine the possibilities of everything working out in your favor, with the same intensity of emotion that you have when you worry, before you know it, you’re out of your funk and excited again. More often than not I am pleasantly surprised.
We have no way of knowing what is going to happen in the future, yet for some reason when we worry we think we do.
In the process of training our minds to think more positively about the possibilities in our life, life becomes less of a struggle and more of an exciting journey of discovery. When we dance on the river of life, we welcome what’s next. What you just read was excerpted from #DancingontheRiver.
Eventually there is a turning point, when most of our thoughts are on what’s possible, rather than on what can go wrong.
Until then, walk in freedom and
Embrace this Great Mystery, this Great Adventure, called, “Life,”
Mark Susnow is a life coach and strategist and thought-leader who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 25 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation.
If you are curious to find out how Mark can make a difference in your life both personally and professionally, you are invited to contact him at 415.453.5016 or email him at firstname.lastname@example.org. Find out about his new book, The Soul of Uncertainty, a Fable for our Times.
The Soul of Uncertainty, a Fable for our Times, and his other books are available for purchase at http://www.amazon.com
#MarkSusnow #InspirePossibility #TheSoulofUncertainty #DancingontheRiver #ReduceWorryProcess
“An unlikely hero meets a modern-day mystic, who entices him to step into the greater mystery of life. In reading this story you’ll feel called to do the very same thing.”
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