Yesterday I wrote that changing the questions you ask yourself, changes how you experience life. Rather than thinking, What Now, you think How can you Serve.

As you start your day I would suggest that you ask yourself one more thing. Use your curiosity to create a great day. Here’s how you do it. Ask yourself what the highlight of your day is going to be. I ask in this way. “I wonder what the highlight is going to be.” I don’t know. I’m curious. As I am writing this, I’m looking at what the rest of my day looks like. As I experience the day I’m curious if this is the moment.

As a life coach I have found that most people make it way too complicated. They go through their day experiencing the same thing they did the day before. They are on automatic pilot and at the end of the day they are tired and drained.

It’s the appreciation of the little things that makes your life extraordinary. The highlights are usually little things that you take for granted. There’s that smile that someone gives you. There’s that listening to what the other person has to say. There’s seeing a beautiful cloud formation or someone playing in the park. Or savoring the flavor of a food that you particularly like….or noticing how beautiful a flower is and what it smells like.

We go through our day overlooking these finer points. But this is what makes the difference in how we experience our lives. Before you know it you have an attitude of gratitude.

And here’s what is really cool…it doesn’t take any more time to notice the little things.It just takes more attention.

JOURNEY ON

MARK
Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

In a life coaching session this morning with let’s call her Sally, a professional and mother, we discussed her tendency to react negatively when clients called her. Sally isn’t the only one. Many clients I work with often have a feeling of dread that comes and go more than they like. When that phone rings they think to themselves, “What now?”

Sally and other clients and I am sure many of you reading this blog tend to overreact to everyday events. It’s like we are waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I reminded Sally that she is in a service profession. Service professionals are there to serve others. However with the demands of running it as a business, they forget why they are in the business in the first place. They want to make a difference.

I suggested to Sally that whenever she gets a phone call during the day that she ask herself, “How can I serve this client?” And to be grateful for the call. Without that call and the call from others she wouldn’t be able to stay in business.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

As we all know at some point in our life we start to feel boxed in by our life circumstances. Our choices seem limited by our beliefs around what is possible in our life. And when we are really honest with ourself we know that our beliefs are just beliefs and not truth.

It’s difficult for many of us to accept this truth, but if you accept it, you will have a new sense of freedom.

What is really disturbing is that these beliefs which limit what’s possible in our lives today are based upon the meaning and significance we gave events that happened when we were kids.

The meaning you have given these past events including characterizations about yourself, such as “you’re not lovable…You don’t deserve better,” are running your life today.

Freeing yourself from this past is the first step in experiencing more personal freedom in your life. Look back at your life and realize that every event and experience that has occurred has made you what you are today.

Take a look at some of your past experiences. Can you give this past experience a different meaning? I know you can but even if you can’t what about being open to the possibility that because of this event you are better for it. Sometimes forgiving yourself or someone else is also freeing. Stop hanging on and let it go. Let go of your attachments and your identification with what has happened. Be willing to give it new meaning.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

In a life coaching session this morning with let’s call him Carl, we discussed Carl’s excessive worry about his life and its inherent challenges. These concerns covered the whole gambit and challenges; relationships, financial and health. From time to time Carl begins to freak out about what he has to do in the next few weeks. And Carl’s concern with money weighs heavily on him.

These concerns have bothered Carl for quite some time. Carl believes like many of those who I work with that when his circumstances change, he won’t worry as much.

I have encouraged Carl to meditate and exercise regularly. However his concerns get in the way of his having a committed program.

Carl is concerned with what might happen in the future which is unknown. We have no way of knowing what might happen. It could be totally different than what we think.

When these circumstances are resolved there will be a new set of circumstances to replace them. That’s the way it alway is. Here’s why I say that.

Carl’s concern is not really about his current set of circumstances but about how he relates to the future which is unknown. It’s always going to be that way. And the future never arrives because it’s always out in the distance.

Carl like many of us needs to change how he relates to the unknown…to uncertainty. I always say make the unknown your friend.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

In a life coaching session with let’s call her Sally, we discussed the way that she perceived herself. When I first began working with her, she was in the process of buying a professional practice. Sally did not think of herself as a confident person. Each day was an emotional struggle for her.

As we continued our work together, Sally became more comfortable with her new practice and the uncertainty that surrounded it.

It’s a fact of life that there will always be uncertainty to some extent. We’re human and have insecurities that have been with us most of our lives.

In the process of self discovery these tendencies diminish.

In our work together, there was a turning point for Sally. We talked about the courage that it took for a 50 year old woman to buy a professional practice. it took a leap of faith by someone who was willing to go for it and had a strong belief in themselves, even with the insecurities.

I asked Sally to start thinking about herself as the type of person who is willing to go for it. As she began to focus on the inner qualities that are necessary to go for it, she began to see herself as a self-confident person and became more comfortable with the uncertainty that the future might hold.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Today I was thinking about conflict and the many emotions associated with it. First there is the disagreement. Your view is not in alignment with the other persons. You don’t like it. Your body tightens and your breathing becomes shallow.

Then there is the venting phase which involves making the other person wrong. You feel hurt and have a need to be vindicated. In your mind you make the other person wrong a thousand times and gather support for your viewpoint. You process it with other people until finally they don’t want to hear it anymore.

And then there is the letting go. You no longer have the need to talk about it. You become quiet and let it go. You become detached from the outcome. And as you become quieter, the conflict goes away.

Today I felt at peace with a current business conflict I was having. As I found the peace within myself, the conflict didn’t bother me any more. And then I ran into an old friend who I hadn’t seen in many years. I no longer was carrying the baggage of the prior conflict. I could be totally in the present and maintained my inner peace and enjoyed the day.

Journey On

Mark

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Many years ago I had one of those experiences that you never forget. It shows up in so many areas of my life. I was a trial lawyer for 30 years and have been a musician since I was seven. Most people would say I am comfortable in front of people. But even now, whenever I’m in front of people, there is an inner conversation going on that I do not want to have. It is always a variation of “can I do it” or “will it be good enough.”

This experience occurred when I participated in a weekend workshop sponsored by the Actors Institute which was designed to increase one’s ability to give better presentations. The participants included actors, musicians, comedians, lawyers and politicians.

After a long weekend of exercises designed to “stretch” us we were required to give our presentation. We then critiqued our own and each others performance. Without exception, our critique of our own presentation was much harsher than the groups. The instructor commented that if we had to hire ourselves we would never get a job!

We are so hard on ourselves. The truth is, in the process of trying to be perfect, we often focus on our imperfections and sometimes that is all we see. Because of this fear of being imperfect, we procrastinate and agonize over seemingly easy tasks. My wife Annie reminded me of a story that illustrates this point.

The master lived quite a distance from the stream. Every day his servant, the water bearer, would walk from his master’s house to the stream with two large pots, each hung on opposite ends of a pole which he carried across his neck. One pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the walk, while the other pot had a crack in it and arrived only half full.

This went on for a full two years and the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, but the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its imperfections and of the fact that it was only able to accomplish half of what it had been made to do.

Finally the cracked pot summoned up enough courage to have its own conversation with the water bearer. It went something like this. ” I am ashamed and I want to apologize to you for I have let you down. Because of my flaws you have had to do twice as much work.” But the water bearer would have nothing of this conversation. “Did you notice the beautiful wild flowers along the path and did you notice that these beautiful flowers were only on your side of the path?” That’s because I have always known of your flaws and I took advantage of them and planted flower seeds on your side of the path and every day you watered them. And these beautiful flowers that you have watered everyday grace the master’s table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house.”

Each of us has our own unique flaws and in our own way we are all cracked pots. With all our imperfections we create a lot of beauty and good in the world. Perhaps what real courage is all about is not letting our fears and imperfections stop us. Instead of procrastinating we confidently take the next step.

Imagine experiencing your imperfections in a different way– as gifts or unique opportunities. Identify an imperfection in your life that gets more attention than it deserves and discover what gift is hidden in that imperfection. From this new vantage point imagine what could be possible? Let me know what you discover.

Journey On

Mark

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

KEEP YOUR WORD: Today I MADE myself go to the gym…What good is a gym if you don’t go? It felt good. I didn’t give into my saying to myself, “That’s good enough, I went there a few days ago.” Lately that self talk has been limiting and preventing me from taking the next step. Now I am motivated to change my workout frequency. I do mountain bike and I do get exercise that way….but I know I need to do that ab work. The ab work that most of us hate. And we hate noticing that’s what we need to do. And the abs are the only thing.

I have always said that one’s personal power is directly related to their ability to keep their agreements to themselves. As you become impeccable with your word to yourself your ability to achieve a level of mastery over your thoughts is achieved.

The theory being that you will become capable of shifting your thoughts from dwelling on the negative to the positive. Yes the preparation for this starts with saying, “Yes” to the gym” and doing that abwork. It starts with following through which becomes a positive pattern when you consistently keep your word. The hope is that with time and commitment you develop the ability to keep transcending what is possible in your life.

When is saying “no” stopping you? What is it preventing you from experiencing and accomplishing?

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

I’m excited. Lance Armstrong, a hero of mine, is again competing in the Tour de France. His book, It’s not about the Bike. is one of the most inspirational books I’ve ever read.

Throughout the years, I’ve been an avid mountain bike enthusiast. When I’m on the trails, I’m reminded of the freedom that I often experienced in my youth. When I saw my young friend Bobby, )I’m like a big brother to him) at the health food store we talked about going on a mountain bike ride. I used to ride on the mountain quite regularly…Lately I haven’t been as consistent, so I had some reservation about going on this ride. We did go a few days later. The few days prior to the ride I thought about which trail to take and the difficulty of each one.

I knew that no matter what trail we took I would be out of my comfort zone. Here we were and I looked at the top of the trail and wondered if this was too difficult for me. I glanced at the steepness of the incline somewhere in the 25-30 degree range.

In the past when trying to climb these more difficult trails I felt tired before I even began. Off we went. I was determined to make this day different. I had been experimenting with a new approach.

Once I looked at where I was headed my focus was on what was immediately in front of me. When I just looked at the one or two yards ahead I didn’t think about the steepness. So that’s what I did. One step at a time. Gradually we approached the top. I wasn’t tired and felt excited about what my next challenge was going to be.

And that’s the way it is with our lives. When we have a project that needs to be done we think about it in its entirety. We think about the difficulty and sometimes the task seems daunting. When we change the inquiry from “can I do it” to “what’s the next step” our life becomes not only manageable but easy and fun. So I ask you….What’s your next step?

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow’s life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

It works. It’s easy to find an hour to do anything. What this means is that you can complete major projects without altering your schedule. Just knowing this gets rid of a lot of stress. First estimate how long you think the particular project will take. Let’s say five hours. Then schedule it into your appointment book. Then it’s a matter of honoring what’s in your appointment book. It seems that when we write something down it has more significance…It makes it more real.

Here’s another way to look at it. Think about all the things you are “good at” or perhaps were “good at”. All of them required practice and commitment. Big projects are nothing more than a bunch of little ones. A movie is really hundreds of stills moving at an accelerated pace.

Part of living in this day and age is to slow down the pace. So the movie of your life is nothing more than just a series of moments. And as you become more focused on these moments rather than the future you’ll be less stressed out. You’ll enjoy what you’re doing more and less concerned what will happen down the road.

So slow it down and enjoy the moment. The one hour formula is a good start. As you are consistent with this practice your life will be dramatically different.

Mark Susnow’s life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016