When I read Les’s email this morning I had a big smile on my face. Last week I asked Les, who is one of my life and business coaching clients, to write out what he learned from last year’s economic crunch. Les who is an architect summarized the year for himself…clients cancelling projects, low self-esteem, eating more than he wanted to and thinking about leaving the area. He was on his way out.

He hung in there. What we had been discussing in our coaching relationship is his relationship to the unknown. He saw the unknown as threatening and scary. Many of us do.

He slowly began to think about the unknown in a new way. I suggested that he see the “unknown as his friend.” With that in mind he became curious as to all of the good that might happen. I even suggested that this year could be his best year in his business. It all started with a call out of the blue as Les calls it. It was for a big project. This was the first of just many projects that have been coming his way. He has been on a roll and has a full schedule.

What I have seen is that this cycle for Les was just one of many that we all go through in our lifetimes. What we have to learn to do in the meantime is to hang in there until the tides change. But if we let the cycle get us too far down we won’t be ready to enjoy the next phase of the cycle when it comes and it will.

We have a choice. Choose happiness. Smile and laugh a little bit more than yesterday.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com

Themes for the year. That’s what we’ve been discussing in the life coaching and executive coaching sessions so far. For example, your theme might be making your life an adventure. Or it might be seeing yourself, dancing for joy. Mine was seeing this year as a magical year.

Yet there is one theme that needs to be in the forefront. It is the one theme that holds us back from living a fulfilling life. And that is accepting ourselves. There is that voice that we repeat to ourselves, if only this was different about myself. It might be twenty pounds lighter, a few inches taller or shorter, more hair or different color hair. And I’m sure you have your variation on this theme.

In a life coaching session yesterday, let’s call her Bonnie felt that if only she were fifteen pounds lighter she would feel better about herself. Truth be told, Bonnie is a striking woman who most people notice. I guarantee you that noone thinks that Bonnie needs to lose any weight. But that’s not what’s important. Bonnie believes that if she lost that weight she would feel better about herself. She might for a while and then something else would come up. Bonnie has to accept herself and her perceived imperfections.

Many years ago Maxwell Maltz, a plastic surgeon, wrote the book PsychoCynernetics. Maltz noted that most of the patients who consulted with him, didn’t like a physical characteristic about themselves. He observed that even after performing the surgery and correcting the physical quality that they didn’t like, they still didn’t like themselves.

Maltz concluded that unless they were willing to do the inner work, their feeling about how they looked wouldn’t change. Unless they learned to love themselves, they would feel dissatisfied.

Loving yourself is a choice that you make over and over again. How we see our lives is a decision we make. Choose happiness and your whole world changes. What is it that you don’t accept about yourself? How would your life be different if you accepted that part of yoruself?

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com

Where were you on this historic morning? It was a special moment that I wanted to share. When I heard that the town was opening its chambers so that we could see the inauguration together, I made the decision to head on down there. I left the house early and parked the car. On my way down the street, I stopped in the coffee shop, which also had a big screen and began a conversation with a good friend.

The whole world was watching as the new president took his oath of office. We are beginning a new era…an era full of hope and optimism, yet one with more than its share of challenges.

More than ever with innovative technologies almost daily, the world is not only changing rapidly but is connected in ways that never before existed. Through the internet, within seconds, anything we write can be read by someone around the world.

These last eight years have been challenging….the most challenging in many years. As a society we created the ground work for someone like Obama to show up. It was first the change of consciousness on an inner level and then the manifestation of this consciousness which is Obama. But first we had to create George Bush to get there.

And that’s the way our life works. It is our nature to create our lives as we live them. One thing always leads to the next. Even when you see darkness, you are preparing yourself so that you can see the light. Struggle prepares you for ease. Discipline leads to freedom. That’s the polarity of life’s seeming contradictions…it’s the duality we experience in day-to-day living.

There is no ending, just constant evolution. It’s all as one of my teachers would have said, “Grist for the Mill.”

You can’t stop the “dark clouds” from drifting through so don’t obsess about them. Know that when the “dark clouds” dissipate, you’ll see the sun again. Better days are here again.

Instead of sailing into the headwinds, we are sailing with the wind at our backs. It becomes more fun and more exciting.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com

I have noticed that their is more optimism than there has been in a long time. And yes we still have a lot of problems. Many folks that I run into are excited about this Tuesday…we still have work to do, we will be reminded. We don’t mind because we believe that we have the leadership to guide and inspire us. We are willing to do our share.

So many times in our lives we have held back, never really allowing ourselves to think about our deepest longings for the fear that we will be disappointed. Isn’t that the way it is in many relationships that we have. To avoid feeling pain, we hold back, keeping something in reserve in case it doesn’t work. That’s our strategy and there is nothing wrong with it unless we stop going for our joy. And that’s what we do too often. We stop going for it and instead let the fear of the pain, run our lives.

I wrote in the Year of Living Magically that we are on the verge of a dawn of a renaissance. In more ways than one we are experiencing a rebirth in the way that we are thinking about the future. We are hopeful….it makes what we are doing now seem more meaningful.

As Martin Luther King once said, there is a Fierce Urgency of Now. Don’t wait any longer. The time is at hand. Whatever you dream about doing, do it now.

The world needs you. Know that by you being you, you are making a unique contribution to the world.

Choose to be connected…choose to accept more joy in your life…choose happiness.

Journey On

Mark

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com

Let’s just call him Les. Les is one of my business and life coaching clients and is an architect. His business was down last year and in December he was real discouraged. i told him that none of us can predict the future. I reminded him that life is cyclical and things can turn around in a second. Just when we see a trend that seems like it is never going to stop, before we know it, it has reversed.

In our coaching session before the holiday I suggested to Les that next year, 2009, could be his best year yet. When we met yesterday, Les told me that he his bid on a project was accepted and most likely this year will be his best year yet.

He also told me that in December when I suggested to him this possibility, he didn’t think it was possible.

So here he is right on the verge and the year has just started. In my last newsletter I held the vision that this year is the year of living magically.

Imagine this year in that context. As the year progresses you think about the magic in your life. You are looking for the magic. You are also allowing yourself to think in those terms. Allow yourself to accept and receive the blessings that are coming your way. Stay open. It is a choice you make over and over again. Choose happiness-smile and laugh a little bit more than yesterday and Journey On.

Mark

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com

So here we are. I bet you’re curious about the title. No I haven’t lost my mind. Let me tell you how I came up with this phrase.

We all have our share of challenges that concern us from time to time; some more challenging than others. Some of us even feel overwhelmed by what they are faced with. Others, although not overwhelmed, are very concerned by what they are facing. So much so that they don’t do anything about it. They know what they have to do, but a paralysis sets in. They lose their nerve, and feel like they are losing control, yet hang on by a thread.

Even though life might be like that for you, there are still a lot of things that have given you joy at one time or the other. They might be little things that you have forgotten about because of all of your responsibilities. If you let them, your responsibilities and obligations take over and run your life.

In my own life, I keep pretty busy, but lately have made time for tennis. At one time in my life, I use to be a pretty good player. I hadn’t played for five years. I forgot how much fun playing tennis is. Going dancing is always lot of fun. It’s really taking time to do what gives you joy. So when I say make time for the jollies…I mean make time for what gives you “joy.”

Those things that you have to do or that you are concerned about, don’t go away. Even when you get them off your “to do” lists, they reemerge in a different form. Even when your “to do” list still has plenty of things on it and you still have loose ends in your life, what are some things you can do that will give you the “jollies?” Make a list that has at least 3 things on them. Make an agreement with yourself when you’ll begin them.

JOURNEY ON

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com

It was a great way to close out the year. When Annie and I read the email about the play, To Whom the Bridge Tolls, a satire about Marin Life, it seemed like the perfect way to spend the evening and bring in the new year.

Most all of us have experienced a difficult and challenging year. It’s also been a year that has paved the way for a year of change and opportunity.

Yes I was glad that we closed the chapter on 2008…..but for a different reason. I’m excited about 2009 beginning. I’m excited because I believe that the world is ready for a new approach and attitude to the age old problems.

As we were watching the show, I thought about how much I was laughing. And I don’t mean chuckling, but belly laughs. It was a great show. And because it was a satire about Marin life of which I am part of and enjoy, the jokes were in many ways about me and my choices.

And with most satires there is that line between truth and fantasy. In the show most of the jokes hit home and not only did I accept them, I enjoyed them. In fact one of them was about Life Coaches.

Of course when you are a writer, you have flashes of insights that you want to share with your audiences. I thought about what I would blog the next day. Laughter and acceptance were the two themes that rang the loudest. Finding the humor and paradox in the life we are living and accepting what that is. Laughter sure has a way of loosening us up.

I became clear about 2009. It’s my intention to laugh even more than I did in 2008 and I did my share of laughing; to see the humor in the life that I’m living; being able to play in it and see the bigger game.

I think that this is a worthy challenge for all of us. Since the pain is already there, it’s time to experience the other side, the side that brings us joy and well-being. Laugh and play about it all again.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com

i have been thinking about what I would say in this final blog of 2008. I also thought about what has been the biggest challenge for most of my coaching clients whether the focus has been on life coaching, business coaching or executive coaching. It really doesn’t matter since we all have the same challenges. We are bombarded by negative news. This morning after a peaceful meditation and yoga practice I went to the coffee shop and bought a paper which was strictly a habit. Of course the front page was full of bad news. I don’t know why I thought it would be any different.

So that’s the challenge…how to stay positive and to choose happiness in the midst of negative reinforcement. How do we stay upbeat as we go forward in the new year?

I thought of a zen story, which you might have heard before, that reflects this sentiment. A man is pursued by a lion to the cliffs edge. As he quickly looks over the cliffs edge he sees a strawberry vine. He grabs onto the vine and climbs down the cliff to get out of the way of the charging lion. As he dangles, he notices two mice nibbling away at the vine. He looks around and sees a ripe strawberry that he plucks and enjoys.

That’s the challenge for many of us. When things are starting to fall apart, it becomes more difficult to see a way out. From your vantage point now, you probably can’t see it. But you can certainly see that next step that is directly in front of you.

Focus on it. Take it. Choose it. When you choose, it allow yourself to also choose Happiness.

It’s a decision that you make over and over again. Every minute choose to be happy and to smile.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com

This year is coming to an end. Each year has its surprises and disappointments. I don’t think any of us were prepared for the financial downturn that occurred this year.

In many ways our country was adrift, going downhill with ineffective leadership.

And then we had the election with renewed optimism. All of the events of the last eight years, paved the way for new leadership; in many ways a historic time. Without any of them we wouldn’t be where we are today.

So hear we are going forward. Perhaps you didn’t meet many of the goals that you set for yourself.

As you go forward, don’t shy away of setting new goals for the new year. But think of your goals in a different context. Rather than tangible goals such as a better job or making more money or losing that 10-20 pounds that you commit to every year,think of the personal qualities that you want to cultivate and develop. It might be that you want to become a more optimistic person, or a more fun person.

With the same determination, focus on those qualities that you intend to cultivate this year in the following way. Since I have already mentioned becoming more positive, express gratitude for the the optimism in your life; for the faith that you have. Whatever the quality that you wish to cultivate, express gratitude for having it now.

It is my intention to not worry about the future. I would use gratitude in the following way. I am grateful that it is all working out as it should. Everything is in perfect order. Develop your gratitude practice to help you experience your life in the way that you want to live your life.

You get to choose how you want live to live your life. If you want to be happy, choose happiness.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. 415.453.5016

I was having breakfast with my friend Curt this morning. We’ve been friends for many years and have seen each other evolve through many stages in our lives. He knew me when I was single and a trial lawyer. He was with me when I made the decision to give up the law practice and make the transition to becoming a life coach. It’s been nine years since I left the law practice. In the eight years that I have been a life coach I have worked with over a thousand people in different ways. Many were stuck in their lives or were looking to answer a particular challenge. Many who I work with are very successful. If you met them, you would think that they didn’t have a problem in the world. They seemed self-confident and reassured and charismatic.

What I have found is that no matter how self-assured and self-confident one might seem when you meet them, on the inner level they experience the same doubts and insecurities that you do which is usually a version of, “Am I good enough?”

In our work together, we change that mindset so that the unknown rather than scare you, excites you. And you stop worrying about what people might think of you.

In fact, I think that all worry is based on what might happen in the future which is unknown. Are you optimistic about it or pessimistic? That’s the choice that we make over and over again.

I know what my choice is. Even if it doesn’t work out the way I hoped it’s never as bad as I thought. Whatever happens I have more tools to work with. And I’m not as stressed out so that when things go my way, I can enjoy the moment.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. His articles reflect this journey in an inspirational way. http://www.inspirepossibility.com