You worked hard. It’s ready to go but then you get feedback that there is one more thing that you need to do to make it better. You’re somewhat disappointed and frustrated. More work. In your mind you are done with the project. Does this scenario sound familiar? It can apply to so many aspects of our life. We thought we were done and ready to move on. But we’re not.

I’ve been there myself many times. Dig deeper——another opportunity to be better and to gain a deeper grasp of whatever we are doing. Yes, it’s more challenging than we thought and at times we are not sure where we are going or whether it’s worth it. But we keep going forward and learn to be present with the task at hand.

We keep learning. Perhaps the greatest learning is to enjoy the process of going deeper. It could be preparing a report for school, for your job or for the government. There are many layers and many considerations. In the process you develop a greater understanding of whatever it is you are working on. In the process you learn how to be more effective.

Perhaps you come to a different conclusion than the one you originally thought. In the process you become a more effective and evolved human being. It makes life more rewarding and fulfilling. Nothing is a mistake, but feedback for our journey. It serves as information for our internal GPS system that let’s us know that we are off course. So we make the adjustment integrating the new information to right our course. We get there and are more empowered by what we learned on our journey.

ENJOY THE JOURNEY

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes. Give yourself the gift of coaching and make an investment in your future.

You’re out in the woods and you come to a crossroads. You’re not sure which trail to continue on. The trail might even seem to end. You assess the situation. You know if you take the wrong turn, it might be hours before you get back to your car. It might be dark by then.

In some ways that little anecdote is a microcosm of our life. At times life seems complicated and somewhat arbitrary especially when we’re in our victim mentality. All we can think about is how life is unfair. We’re immersed in a pity party. In those moments our focus is on what can go wrong, rather than the solution. We wait for a sign and when one comes along we don’t recognize it.

We seek out others for advice. There are plenty of people out there who mean well. We’re trying to figure out how what they are saying pertains to us, rather than listening to our inner voice. No one knows our situation and our capabilities better than we do. When we try to synthesize what other people are telling us and make it relevant to our life, we lose sight of our unique wisdom.

Each of us has something special to share. But when we water down what our real message is, our unique wisdom is not shared with the world. Not only do other people lose out on the benefit of our unique contribution, we are out of integrity with ourself.

Believe in yourself and let the world know what your ultimate truth is. They are waiting.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

It’s that time of year. Holiday parties, checking in with friends you haven’t talked to for a while; sending out holiday greetings and messages. We’re checking in. We’re also taking inventory of our life. Was this a good year? Was it a great year? Could I have done better? It really doesn’t matter. It’s in the past. What matters is where we go from here. How can we integrate the lessons from the past into our life journey. There is a quote that I read many years ago that reminds me of this truth. “Today is the first day of the rest of your life.”

What if from this moment on we make a vow to ourself that it’s all in our hands. With this in mind, in every moment we are setting an intention for how we want to live and what is important. We are sending a message to the universe as to what we believe in. We are sending a message as to what we stand for.

Having a clear picture of what that is enables us to develop a roadmap for our journey.
Have a reason for why it matters enables us to get past those inevitable bumps in the road.

It’s a matter of priorities. It’s a matter of values. It’s a matter of believing with our heart and soul that we matter and what we have set out to do can make a difference in the world. When you feel it and believe in what you are doing, then it’s just a matter of time until you get there.

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

ENJOY THE JOURNEY

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

Do you feel the full range of all of your emotions? Do you notice that the negative emotions tend to get most of your attention? You worry more than you would like. You worry about your future.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Shift focus and say to yourself, “it’s a beautiful day?” You just don’t say it, you feel it and saying it is just an expression of what is inside of you. You just notice and enjoy what you see and feel. It doesn’t really matter what the weather is. The feeling is inside. So let yourself enjoy the moment. Don’t analyze it.

Notice and appreciate the little things that before didn’t seem important. Take it all in and let go of your concerns, the worries and insecurities about what could go wrong.

Just for today take it all in and focus on what gives you joy.
Just for today don’t judge what is happening. Just notice and be curious. You might say to yourself “I wonder how great this day can be.”

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

Every once in a while you have the good fortune to be in a room when the speaker says something so profound that you have to write it down. I always take that as a sign that I should not only write it down, but explore it further.

The process of writing then becomes a journey of discovery. Quite often that exploration leads to new insights.

“I am run by the need to control and to be perfect,” is what she said.

There is some of that attitude in all of us. We all know what control means. It implies a certain rigidity and unwillingness to allow for an expansion of what might be. We want it our way, whether it’s something that we are involved in, or our interaction with another person. Even though we have heard over and over again we can’t control another person, we keep trying.

The need to be perfect and to control implies a lack of trust in what might be. When we have a preconceived notion as to the perfect outcome, we limit the natural unfolding and what’s possible. We don’t allow for the possibility that the circumstances and our notion of perfection might change. We don’t allow for the possibility that perfection is an evolving dynamic state of being.

For many years my life was structured with raising a family and having a law career. In a professional setting we can see the need to be perfect as compliance with certain rules, regulations and deadlines. When I was an attorney, if we didn’t file a document timely, we wouldn’t get the opportunity to discuss the merits of our position. Being timely and getting the project done was just the price of admission.

We also had to mindful that there was an external standard that defined excellence and perfection. But even in that environment there was a great amount of subjectivity as to what was a perfect result. We are reminded of this truth by some of the phrases that are used in everyday conversations.
“You played that perfectly.” “That worked to perfection.“

Once you have paid the price of admission and are in the arena, you get to bring the real you to the party. You can be effective in a way that feels authentic and be successful in your career. In my own way I was able to make my career a form of self-expression and a way to more fully express who I was.

For various reasons, not all of us get to play in the arena. My friend, who I will refer to Carl in this article, was like that. For him getting it done wasn’t a priority.

He is a music prodigy. He can play six or seven instruments as well as anyone plays just one. For the last ten years he has been working on a recording project. But he is reluctant to put it out there and share it with others. For Carl nothing is good enough. At some point you have to let it go.

Life, like art, is a process and journey of discovery. By the time I wrote my book, Dancing on the River, I had much practice in letting go and trusting the process of creation. By that time I had written several newsletters and shared them with many others all over the world. I kept working them before releasing them to the universe. I always wondered if they were good enough. It was only by sharing them with others and allowing room for feedback that I developed the confidence that I had something of significance to contribute.

That’s how it worked for me with Dancing on the River. With each draft I felt closer to letting it go and sharing my contribution. At some point you have to let go of control and the need to be perfect and trust the feedback from the universe and from others.

Rather then thinking about the need to be perfect, think about perfection in a more enlightened way. Perfection is not an absolute standard that you are striving to get to, but a dynamic evolving state that has its share of peaks and valleys. In that process the path of perfection become your greatest teacher. You learn to enjoy each step on the way even when you are not sure where it is taking you.

What we find on this journey of discovery is that life has many more complexities than we envisioned. We can’t control every possibility and there are always going to be a few loose ends. We have to learn in live in this uncertainty. Finally we get to that place when we say to ourself, “It’s ready, I’m ready.” We let go and move on to the next phase. There always will be that next phase.

For me that next phase is the work that I am doing now which is an intuitive and creative process. Along the way we discover what life has in store for us. Sometimes life knocks us to our knees, but we get up and face another day stronger for the experience.

Each day becomes an ongoing adventure. We learn to embrace the unfolding of this adventure as the perfection of the universe.

Journey On.

Mark

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

In so many things that we do preparation is the key to success and fulfillment. Quite often we don’t see any results for some time. Think of a garden. You pull the weeds, turnover the soil and mix in compost. When you begin to harvest what you planted it’s a great feeling.

Because we understand the cyclical pattern of nature, we trust the process. We also know that we can only take one step at a time and each step prepares us for the next so that we can reap the harvest.

When we harvest the fruits of our labor we have a sense of fulfillment because of the effort that went into it. It wasn’t just given to us. Much hard work was involved.

All of life is like that. There are always going to be obstacles and challenges. They are there to challenge us to look deeper and to try harder. These difficulties serve us. Honor them rather than complain about them.

BE THE BEST YOU, YOU CAN BE

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

When someone asks you how are you doing, what do you usually say? What words do you normally use to describe how you are feeling. Most of us have what I would call a default point. We use certain words that we have learned to become comfortable with. As we stretch ourselves and use more empowering words to describe what’s going with us, our state of being also changes. We feel more optimistic and more excited.

Let me explain why this is so. Each word that we express requires us to use different facial muscles and to use them differently depending on the particular word. The neurons connected to each facial muscle are also connected to different centers of the brain stimulating the release of hormonal endorphins which result in different emotions.

Let’s do something a little bit different that we normally do. Let’s make this blog more interactive. The following is a process that I facilitate with some of my life coaching clients. As you read this, repeat the phrase below to yourself with focus on the last word and notice what you feel and the muscles that you use to repeat the word. Make this fun. What you learn will be invaluable.
Repeat the following statements: What do you notice when you repeat the last word of the phrase?

I”m doing OK.
I’m doing fine. What did you notice this time? Anything different?
I’m doing good. What about this phrase? Did you notice any movement in other areas of your body?
I’m doing great. Notice your tone in your voice and how use your muscles. How did that feel?
I’m doing fabulous. Could you say that without moving your body. Was the pacing of the words different?

I’m amazed. Again notice if you move your body and what you do with your hands. What about the tone of your voice?

You have the potential and the means to make ordinary experiences of your life exciting. Integrate one or two words that you ordinarily don’t use into your conversations and see what happens. Notice what happens when you say I’m excited.

BE BOLD; BE ADVENTUROUS

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

Do you compare yourself to others? Perhaps it’s just in a subtle way. We might compare how we look to some image that we notice in a magazine or on a television commercial or program. We compare ourselves to an image not base on reality, but on modern technology. Or perhaps we compare our relationship situation to someone else’s. There is no way for us to really know what is going on. The same goes with our career. It’s difficult to evaluate unless we have the total picture. There is no value in comparing our current situation to the way it use to be. It’s a new day.

It’s easy to lose focus and become discouraged. The sound bites and snippets that we hear and see on TV are geared to get us to think and act in a particular way.

What gets lost is that we are individuals with special qualities and characteristics. I wouldn’t be surprised if there are many people who would love to trade places with you.

You have worked hard to get to this place in your life. You are ready to reap the harvest. You are on the right path because it’s your path and no one else’s. You are the creator of your life. It’s time to claim and honor your uniqueness. You are on the verge of a breakthrough in your life.

I love what Joseph Campbell says in Dark Forest:

“You enter the forest
At the darkest point;
Where there is no path.

Where there is a way or path,
It is someone else’s path.

If you follow someone else’s way,
You are not going to realize your potential.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

Wouldn’t it be great if what you truly wanted for yourself made a difference in the lives of others. I know that most of us would really like that. It would give our life meaning and purpose. If we know that what we do really makes a difference and is important, then we don’t let life’s problems and challenges stop us.

We want to make a difference, but sometimes question the value of what we are doing and ask ourselves if we are really helping others.

Life can benefit by you being the best you can be, even if times it seems a little self-centered. Isn’t that focus and determination the quality that most visionaries possess. As you go deeper and take what you are doing to the next level you open yourself up to a whole world full of possibilities that at one time you didn’t know existed.

When we achieve mastery in one area of our life, our accomplishment has a positive impact on everything else that we are involved in. And it even goes further as there are many others with whom we have never met who benefit from the work we have done.

You have the ability and means to make a positive impact. Don’t let the difficulties and the challenges distract you from your real purpose. They are there to motivate you to look deeper and to open your eyes to possibilities that you were unable to see before.

Be the best you can be. Be willing to share who you are. The world deserves it. Marianne Williamson say it best.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do…It’s not selfish or greedy to achieve your most deeply felt desires. What’s selfish is to do nothing, to accept less
than you could be, when you could be making a difference.

Let the real you shine.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

I’ve often said that it’s up to us. What I mean is that in each day, in each moment, we choose what we focus on. What we focus on determines what we think about. AND whatever we focus on expands. If your focus is on the negative, you are going to see negativity in whatever you do. The good news is that if you focus on the positive, then the positive in your life will also expand.

There are two big questions you can ask yourself on a daily basis. Whatever you are doing or thinking, ask yourself what is possible. And ask yourself what would your look like if things turned out better than you expected. And it can if you stay open to that possibility. We have know way of knowing what the future holds for us. To create the future we want we first have to plant the seed in our subconscious mind by conceiving it in our mind.

Begin by saying it the way you want it to be. Over time you will come to feel it. When you say it’s a beautiful day and feel it, it’s not because of the current weather. It is because you see the beauty in it even with your worries and concerns. Those concerns will always be there.

Life is good even with its worries and concerns because that’s what we focus on. Over time we smile for no reason at all because that smile is an expression of our inner joy.

LET IT IN

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.