We have many thoughts and ideas, but not all of them are acted upon. These thoughts are endless. Brain researchers estimate that we have over 60,000 thoughts in a day. Very few of these thoughts become reality.

But some of these thoughts do get acted upon and become our reality. As we know from doing this work together what we focus on expands. If we focus on the negative then we will attract more of the negative to us. If we worry we will always find things to worry about.

Of course we don’t want that. We have to have a clear sense of what are values and priorities are. We keep going in the direction of making these priorities are reality. Of course along the way there will be many pitfalls and obstacles. But because we have intention and determination, we keep going.

Your life today is a reflection of the choices you have made in the past. That includes your thoughts, your actions and your commitments. If you wonder what’s important to you, look around at your life; where do you live, who are your friends and what are you doing with your life.

To get to where you are now, something deep inside you kept you going. I am sure that you had many reasons to quit along the way, but you kept going. You knew what you wanted. As the year is winding down, it’s a great time to think about all of the blessings in your life. It’s a great reminder of what your values are.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes. Give yourself the gift of coaching and make an investment in your future.

In a life coaching session with let’s call him Carl we discussed what the 3 biggest lessons that he has learned in his lifetime. Carl didn’t just come up with the answers in a heartbeat. It was a process that got him thinking about who he was at this time in his life and what is important to him.

1. Find your own path. That was a struggle for me. We are so influenced by our families and the latest trends or schemes to make money, we lose sight of what is important to us…it takes a life time of inner reflection to discover what our core values are….the late sage,.Joseph Campbell has this perspective in Dark Forest:

You enter the forest
At the darkest point;
Where there is no path.

Where there is a way or path,
It is someone else’s path.

If you follow someone else’s way,
You are not going to realize your full potential.

2. Don’t be so hard on yourself: we are so self-critical….we berate ourselves and talk to ourselves in a more critical way than we would talk to a friend. Along with this one, developing a sense of humor goes a long way. Laugh at yourself..tell a few jokes once in a while…don’t try to always be perfect.

3. Become a better listener than talker. This is also a tough one because it’s our tendency to always want to get in our two-cents worth. So often a conversation is like mental ping-pong. You respond to what the other person says; they respond to what you said and then it becomes a battle to see who gets in the last word. Sure you’ve exchanged a lot of information, but you never got to who each other is.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released May 1, 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

I had a discussion today with someone who saw my work space and made some suggestions as to what I could do to make it more energetically inviting. I agreed with most of her suggestions but was not willing to make all of the suggestions that she recommended. She took this personally….as a sign of disrespect. A feeling of tension ensued.

For a moment it looked like the relationship was over. Relationships need room to breathe. Disagreements often are hurtful, but also an opportunity to get to know the other person on a deeper level. But if you take disagreement personally as a sign of disrespect, then you are shutting off the opportunity for intimacy.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

It’s a great feeling when you can go beyond conflict to the other side. When you don’t it’s limiting.

Learning to not take things personally is an opportunity for you have deeper connection in your life. Take a quick scan of your life…are there situations in your life where you notice where you are blocked? You take something personally and the connection is lost.

In a life coaching session this morning with let’s call her Sally, a professional and mother, we discussed her tendency to react negatively when clients called her. Sally isn’t the only one. Many clients I work with often have a feeling of dread that comes and go more than they like. When that phone rings they think to themselves, “What now?”

Sally and other clients and I am sure many of you reading this blog tend to overreact to everyday events. It’s like we are waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I reminded Sally that she is in a service profession. Service professionals are there to serve others. However with the demands of running it as a business, they forget why they are in the business in the first place. They want to make a difference.

I suggested to Sally that whenever she gets a phone call during the day that she ask herself, “How can I serve this client?” And to be grateful for the call. Without that call and the call from others she wouldn’t be able to stay in business.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Right now I am thinking of all that I have to do. Sometimes the thinking about it prevents me from actually doing it. Sound familiar? For example until I sat down and started writing this blog I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say. I wasn’t sure where I was going. Now that I am actually doing it I see a direction. I have been doing this for a while, so I have learned to trust the process.

And that’s the way with many things in life. Until you actually begin the journey you won’t know where the path that leads you to the magic garden will be. Don’t wait for the whole path to be revealed to you, it never is. As you become more present to what’s in front of you and all around you, you will be better able to recognize the opportunities that are presented to you.

Sometimes it’s a matter of creating your own path. Be the innovator and be willing to think out of the box. Being a master thinker and creator is a great asset. But you also have to take action. So here’s your part.

Perhaps there’s something you really want to happen in your life, a life dream, and you are not sure how to make it happen. After you have identified what that is, what are three things you can take to help you realize your dream?

When will you take them? Who is going to hold you accountable for going forward?

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow’s life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Lately I have been riding my Mt Bike. Yesterday I rode from my house to Bon Tempe which is one of the upper lakes. The first part of the climb isn’t too bad. In fact it’s a good workout but not necessarily challenging. But it’s the next part, from four corners to the upper lakes that is challenging. The incline is much steeper. In fact if you look up it seems daunting. yet you know that the steep part is not very far.

It’s just a few hundred yards…but that stretch is the challenge; on some occasions I have had to stop and walk my bike. I wanted to break this pattern.

Instead of wondering if I could make it to the top, I just focused on the step or two immediately in front of me. I didn’t look to see how far I had to go. For me the choice was simple. By breaking it down into small segmentss I didn’t notice any slope. It was only when I looked at the top that I noticed the steepness. As I pedaled focusing on what was immediately in front of me I reached the top and continued on my way. I wasn’t tired or winded and it was as if I was riding on a level trail.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Have you heard the expression “if you don’t use it you lose it”..I have felt that on many occasions especially when I haven’t been doing one of my practices. It’s that feeling when you exercise for the first time in a month. You know you need to do it but it’s not fun. That’s the way learning new things is. At first it’s awkward and difficult. But gradually it starts to feel better. You’re glad you’re having a new conversation. Relationships are much the same way. There is always room for a new conversation and an opportunity to learn something new about yourself.

How satisfied are you with the quality of your relationships? What can you do to make them better? When’s the last time you have made a new friend? Real communication is an art form that is alway expanding and always full of new possibilities.

Here is a focus for the next week. Think about a person with whom you would want to transform the quality of your communication. What would have to shift? What would you have to do to make it happen? What’s in the way of you doing what you have to do? And yes it usually starts with you. You have to make the first step. Be willing to put yourself out there. Perhaps make that phone call you have been putting off. Or send an email you have been delaying.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Many years ago, I had one of those experiences that you never forget. It shows up in so many areas of my life. In my previous life, I was a trial lawyer for 30 years and have been a musician since I was seven. Most people would say I am very comfortable in front of people. But even now, whenever I’m in front of people, there is an inner conversation going on that I do not want to have. It is always a variation of “can I do it” or “will it be good enough.”

This experience occurred when I participated in a weekend workshop designed to increase one’s ability to give better presentations sponsored by the Actors Institute. The participants included actors, musicians, comedians, lawyers and politicians.

After a long weekend of exercises designed to “stretch” us we were required to give our presentation. We then critiqued our own and each other’s performance. Without exception, our critique of our own presentation was much harsher than the groups. The instructor commented that if we had to hire ourselves we would never get a job!

We are so hard on ourselves. The truth is, in the process of trying to be perfect, we often focus on our imperfections and sometimes that is all we see. Because of this fear of being imperfect, we procrastinate and agonize over seemingly easy tasks. My wife Annie reminded me of a story that illustrates this point.

The master lived quite a distance from the stream. Every day his servant, the water bearer, would walk from his master’s house to the stream with two large pots, each hung on opposite ends of a pole which he carried across his neck. One pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the walk, while the other pot had a crack in it and arrived only half full.

This went on for a full two years and the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, but the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its imperfections and of the fact that it was only able to accomplish half of what it had been made to do.

Finally the cracked pot summoned up enough courage to have its own conversation with the water bearer. It went something like this. “I am ashamed and I want to apologize to you for I have let you down. Because of my flaws you have had to do twice as much work.” But the water bearer would have nothing of this conversation. “Did you notice the beautiful wild flowers along the path and did you notice that these beautiful flowers were only on your side of the path?” That’s because I have always known of your flaws and I took advantage of them and planted flower seeds on your side of the path and every day you watered them. And these beautiful flowers that you have watered everyday grace the master’s table. Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace his house.”

Each of us has our own unique flaws and in our own way we are all cracked pots. With all our imperfections we still create beauty and good in the world. Perhaps what real courage is all about is not letting our fears and imperfections stop us. Instead of procrastinating we confidently take the next step.

You might want to take some time to journal or just sit as you reflect upon the following inquiry. Imagine experiencing your imperfections in a different way– as gifts or unique opportunities. Identify an imperfection in your life that gets more attention than it deserves and discover what gift is hidden in that imperfection. From this new vantage point imagine what could be possible?

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

One of the biggest challenges that we face in this busy world is how to live our life in harmony with our deepest values. Discovering what these values and priorities are, is the first phase of a six step process that I take my life coaching clients through.

In the second phase, which may be the most difficult, we work on establishing clear boundaries, which requires you to say “no.” For many people, this is one of the most difficult words to say. Whether it’s in a personal relationship or in the workplace many are fearful of the repercussions if they say ”no,” and or reluctant to disappoint another.

But think of the alternatives, by acquiescing, you end up agreeing to live someone else’s life and resenting it. To put it another way, setting clear boundaries is about reclaiming your life and reclaiming your power.

For example, many busy clients that I work with in coaching want to have a relationship, but forget to ask themselves if they are willing to devote the time necessary to have one. If they really want the relationship, then they have to say “no” to other things. It might be saying “no” to working late. How many people do you know who are workaholics? I’ve known more than a few that have sacrificed their relationship for careers. They didn’t have their priorities straight. I remember one client in particular, let’s call him Joe, who worked all the time even though his wife complained about it. When I asked Joe what he would do if his wife left him because he wasn’t emotionally available, he told me that it would never happen. Well Joe was wrong. She left and Joe did everything he could to try to repair the relationship but it was too late.

My friend, Betty, who has a masters degree in social work, values her free time. She said “no” to time consuming career advancements, so that she could have more leisure time.

When I was much younger and just out of school I wanted to keep developing my musicality, which was a passion of mine. Even when I was a busy lawyer I always made time to study and to play music. To make it happen I had to say “no” to many other things but it was worth it. When looking back I realize that what I said “no” to wasn’t actually that important.

When you reclaim your life you find out that you have more empowering choices than you realize. As you reclaim your power you live your life from choice rather than fear. Here are a few suggestions to help you with this inquiry.

• Begin your day with meditation.
• Take some time to read a spiritual or personal growth book.
• Take some time to commune in nature.
• Eat healthy and exercise.
• Don’t forget to take a deep breath and smile!

Living a life in balance takes resourcefulness and commitment. The good news is, as time goes on, it gets easier. It’s an exciting journey with new opportunities being presented constantly.

JOURNEY ON

MARK
Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. 415.453.5016 http://www.inspirepossibility.com

I just got back from my chiropractor’s office. For a long time he had been telling me that his role was to help me maintain my spinal health…that because of my age there was a stiffness that I would have to live with and as long as I wasn’t in pain there was nothing to worry about.

I have also been doing yoga for many years. Yoga has given me hope that as I age rather than becoming stiffer and less able to engage in activities, I would become more flexible and be more active no matter how old I was. And I do notice a difference. I’m more flexible than I have ever been and with each year I become more flexible.

So I have to admit that the chiropractors past prognosis was disappointing.

However today he said that he has been noticing that my spine is more flexible than its ever been and that he should have recognized what was possible with a commitment to a regular yoga practice. He said that my progress was an inspiration to him and that I have been actually reversing the aging process.

It reinforces my commitment to a regular practice. Self care is a path not a solution. It’s an evolutionary process. It’s never too late to begin the journey. Today is the first day of the rest of your life.

Smile and don’t forget to laugh a little bit more than yesterday.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. 415.453.5016 http://www.inspirepossibility.com