Let’s face it. There are some things that we are not good at. No matter how hard we try, we never excel. We barely get by.

And of course, the corollary is true. There are some things that we have always been good at. What we did with these natural inclinations and talents was up to us. It is quite often said that talent only takes you so far. The real mastery comes with how we develop these skill-sets and what we learn from them. Do we bring them to the next level or do they just languish? I have always found that it’s a lot more fun when you are good at something.

To get where we are in our life at this time, we had to do a lot of things well. We made many good decisions and have developed many talents and skills that have served us. More important is what we have learned from them.

In many ways these natural inclinations were gifts. When you think about intelligence, athletic ability or musical talent you realize that you were born with these qualities. When you focus on these gifts, you develop a sense of what your capabilities are and how you can use them as a springboard to what’s next in your life.

Each experience and person you have met has contributed to who you are today. In the process you have developed the most important tool and skill of all. You have developed the gift of learning which in itself is a great skill. However many others have never developed this skill. For them it is a means to an end. Give yourself the gift of learning. It’s exciting, challenging and fulfilling.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and thought leader who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes. Give yourself the gift of coaching and make an investment in your future.

You’re waiting. You’ve asked all of the questions that you have been storing up and still you are not sure about it. There are still the doubts. But deep inside you know that you have to take that step forward.

You’re not sure where the road will take you, but you know that it’s time to embark upon a different type of journey. Where you are now has already been explored——you’re curious about what’s next because you’re an adventurer. You know that something great is waiting for you. You are determined to find out what that is.

You take that next step knowing you will have your share of adversity——that goes with the territory. What is more important is how you handle the adversity. When a difficult challenge is thrown at you, you are able to maintain your center and see possibilities that at one time you didn’t know existed. You couldn’t see them because you were looking for reasons not to move forward.

You were waiting for the perfect time. What you now know is that the only perfect time is now.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes. Give yourself the gift of coaching and make an investment in your future.

Do you compare yourself to others? Perhaps it’s just in a subtle way. We might compare how we look to some image that we notice in a magazine or on a television commercial or program. We compare ourselves to an image not base on reality, but on modern technology. Or perhaps we compare our relationship situation to someone else’s. There is no way for us to really know what is going on. The same goes with our career. It’s difficult to evaluate unless we have the total picture. There is no value in comparing our current situation to the way it use to be. It’s a new day.

It’s easy to lose focus and become discouraged. The sound bites and snippets that we hear and see on TV are geared to get us to think and act in a particular way.

What gets lost is that we are individuals with special qualities and characteristics. I wouldn’t be surprised if there are many people who would love to trade places with you.

You have worked hard to get to this place in your life. You are ready to reap the harvest. You are on the right path because it’s your path and no one else’s. You are the creator of your life. It’s time to claim and honor your uniqueness. You are on the verge of a breakthrough in your life.

I love what Joseph Campbell says in Dark Forest:

“You enter the forest
At the darkest point;
Where there is no path.

Where there is a way or path,
It is someone else’s path.

If you follow someone else’s way,
You are not going to realize your potential.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive & life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. He is passionate about life being an exciting journey of discovery. His enthusiastic and inspiring keynotes on change, leadership and connection thoroughly convey this message to his audiences. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

Sure you can come up with a lot of reasons not to do it. They’re no guarantees except this: If you don’t try it won’t happen.

Your concerns can serve you by making you better prepared but they won’t serve you if they stop you. Even after you make the decision to go for it you might have lingering doubts for quite some time. That goes with the territory as you explore the unknown. It’s also possible that the unknown can be your friend. What would your life be like if you welcomed the unknown future.

But what happens is that we stop and give up on what we really want and believe. But what happens is that you are cheating two people. Yourself for not living up to your highest ideals. And the other person because they don’t get the gifts of your uniqueness. Go ahead and let the world know who you are. Speak your truth———remember it’s your vision not someone else’s.

The challenges along the way make the end result more fulfilling. So whatever it is that you are on the verge of beginning, be bold and take that next step. Now is the only time to begin. With exploring the unknown comes the exhilaration that lets you know that you are totally alive.
Imagine this!!!

What if your life turns out better than you expected. What then?

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive-life coach and speaker who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

In a life coaching session this morning, with let’s call him Chuck, we took a look at the common patterns that were running his life.
Let me tell you a little bit about Chuck. He is a lawyer who was involved in litigation. He was feeling victimized by the other lawyer and by the Judge. As he was telling me about what was going on he was obviously stressed. He had difficulty in sleeping. He felt attacked, misunderstood and angry.

Do Chuck’s patterns seem familiar to you? In interactions with other people, how many times do you feel attacked and misunderstood? How many times do you that you have been defensive?

Let’s take a look at how Chuck reacted to see if we would have reacted in the same way. When the other parties to the lawsuit disagreed with Chuck, he took it personally. We all do that. What about you? How many times do you take it personally when someone disagrees with you? Perhaps you don’t feel respected.

Let’s get a little bit deeper into Chuck’s psyche. There is no question that Chuck likes being a lawyer, but the heat of the moment triggered all of the negative voices that were trying to run his life. In fact they were. Chuck started thinking that he wasn’t a good lawyer and that he mishandled the situation. We all tend to go there. We think we’re inadequate. We’re not good enough. That voice in coaching we refer to as our gremlin. That gremlin is the voice of judgment that drives us crazy. You know it well.

I suggested to Chuck that he separate his gremlin from the rest of his life. I suggested that he give that gremlin a name. I call mine Ralph.
Once we see the gremlin just as a voice and not who we are, the power it has over us, dissipates.

Finally I suggested to Chuck that he shift his thinking to look at his work as fun. He likes it and in fact loves it at times. It’s a radical concept and yet so simple. Declare yourself by simply stating that “this is fun. I’m having a good time.” It’s up to each of us. I call this shift in attitude Dancing on the River. Which is a consciousness that is a reflection of a life decision to be happy in the moment that we make over and over again.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of, Dancing on the River:Navigating Life’s Changes.

I recently was invited to give a talk to a group about my new book and what it means to be Dancing on the River of your life. If you have been reading this blog, you know that it is a consciousness that is a reflection of a life decision to be happy in the moment that you make to be happy over and over again.

In the Q and A afterwards, many pointed out that this was a challenge for them because there was too much pain in their lives. They had been traumatized by events that they have never gotten over. And so often in their everyday living they saw too much suffering in the world.

That is the challenge that we all face. We all have been traumatized by life to various degrees and some of us are more sensitive to these events than others. Our physiology and nervous systems are unique, some more fragile than others.

So how do we find joy in the midst of a somewhat chaotic and sometimes unfair world? That is the challenge we all face. How can we see the light when we are surrounded by darkness. How can we experience joy when there is so much suffering?

In this blog, I want to give you a starting point and I’m not saying to forget the traumatic events of the past. We don’t ever get over them. But we can learn to accept and make peace with them. Many years ago I was privileged to meet a spiritual teacher from India who had taken a vow of silence for 39 years. When asked if he had learned how to be totally present with life, he answered, “NO.” Most of us present in that room were surprised. But he did say that he had learned to make peace with it.

That’s all we can do–make peace and accept all of life. We grieve for the pain in our lives and in the world, but at some point we have to go on with our lives. And what I mean by going on with our lives, is to allow ourselves to experience the joy and blessings that are so abundant when we allow ourselves to remain open to these experiences.

Often it is said that pain builds character. That is true and it also expands our capacity to experience joy. Joy and sorrow come from the same well. As we experience more, our hearts open and we embrace all of life.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He is the author of, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes.

As I wrote in the last blog I would explore in greater detail the power of curiosity. In many ways it goes hand in hand with how we explore our imagination.

What I find interesting is that when one worries, they imagine the worst case scenario. Think about it for a second. Imagine something that you worry about. If nothing comes to you, stay with me here as I’ll share with you a situation that is real common with some of my life coaching clients. They overly concern themselves with money. They project into the future that they will run out of money. If things are going well, they worry that it won’t stay that way. And if things aren’t going well, they worry that they’ll even get even worse.

When one worries they have a strong belief that they can predict the future. Quite often that worry is just a habit that has been with us for a long time. The truth is that we don’t really know what’s going to happen down the road. But we have a need to know, so we latch onto something which is familiar…a familiar emotion that’s been with us most of our life.

The first step in breaking free of this emotion, is realizing that you can’t predict the future. No one can. Once you accept that and become comfortable with “not knowing,” you can play more with your imagination and imagine a future scenario that is greater than anything you can imagine right now.

Being curious as to what that scenario is a fun exploration. Try it and see what happens. I’m excited about my book, Dancing on the River—Navigating Life’s Changes. I’m curious as to what it will lead to. I’m curious as to who I will meet in the process of letting people know about my book. I’m comfortable with not knowing. I’m curious as to what I’ll learn about myself.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will

Wherever we are in life’s evolutionary cycle, we eventually come to the same realization. The outward journey of seeking success is only temporarily fulfilling. Finding joy and meaning is an inner journey. On this journey we cultivate an empowering attitude, which is a reflection of a life decision that we make to be happy and to enjoy life in this moment. We have discovered that our enjoyment and appreciation of life is not dependent on what might happen in the future. It takes a while to come to this realization, but once you do, you have the potential to awaken to a rich inner life that is more fulfilling than you can imagine.

It is my hope that by integrating the following six insights and practices into your life, you will know what it means to be Dancing on the River.

1.How you start your day sets the tone for the day. If you start the day in a hurry it will be extremely difficult to slow down. Most of us rush out of the house in the morning trying to make an appointment or deadline. Underneath the concern that we won’t be able to get it all done is an underlying anxiety that won’t go away.
You sometimes wish you had a magic wand that could make things better. Although there is no magic wand, there is a morning practice that can minimize much of that anxiety. After you wake up and before you do anything else, take 10-15 minutes for reflection. Perhaps you already have a meditation practice. If you don’t, just sit still in a quiet place and pay attention to your breath.
After meditation begin to focus on what you are grateful for. Perhaps there are only a few things that you can think of in the beginning, but once you make this a daily practice, you realize how blessed you are. By focusing on what you are grateful for, your focus shifts to what’s right in your life, rather than on what’s wrong. It’s an amazing practice, which has the power to transform your life.

2. Develop the practice of Curiosity. I didn’t realize how powerful of a concept this could be until I integrated it into my life. Here’s what I suggest to get you going. In the morning, after expressing gratitude, reflect upon your day wondering about what the highlight of your day might be. By being curious as to what that is, you’ll create a positive expectation as the day progresses. No matter what is happening in your life, rather than worrying about the outcome, be curious as to how it is all going to unfold. By being curious, you’re also open to those pleasant surprises—those moments of grace that uplift your spirit.

3. Learn how to recognize and know your VOJ. The VOJ is that voice of judgment that drives you nuts. You know it. We all do. You would give anything to silence it even if just for a few minutes. The sooner that you can recognize your VOJ, the sooner you can become free of the hypnotic spell that can last a lifetime if you don’t do anything about it. But the doing is a different type of doing. It’s just noticing. I have found that giving this voice a name has been effective in breaking the spell that it has over me. I call my VOJ, Ralph. This is a lifelong challenge so don’t be discouraged if you don’t notice anything immediately.

4. Self-Acceptance is the next practice. Let’s be honest with ourselves. There are certain things we can’t change about ourselves. We can’t change who are parents are. We can’t change our country of origin. We can’t change all of the injustices in the world, although we might try. But we do have the potential to change how we think about ourselves and how we think about the circumstances of our lives. Even though, we are our own worst critics at times, our work is to accept those things that we don’t like about ourselves—that dark side often referred to as our “shadow.” Once you accept those things about yourself that you don’t like or are embarrassed by, you will feel lighter and freer. 
And isn’t that what it’s all about–becoming lighter.

5. Introduce positive self-talk into the conversation. Now that you are more familiar with those voices and patterns that have been running your life, it’s time to listen to a new voice that needs to be nurtured and cultivated. It’s a voice if honored and respected can change how you think about yourself. I call this voice your VIP. It’s the voice of Inspiration and Praise that we don’t listen to, or hear enough. That voice has become my inner champion. When I think that I shouldn’t have felt the way I did about something that happened, or that I shouldn’t have acted in a certain way, my VIP sends me a few words of encouragement, by saying to me, “you’re doing great. You handled that well.”

It takes conscious effort and resolve to cultivate your VIP. As you learn to trust and listen to it, how you feel about your life shifts.

6. Make time for the Jollies. So here we are again with another new phrase. No I haven’t lost my mind. 
We all have faced our share of challenges that at times seems overwhelming. Even so, there are many things that have given us joy at one time or the other. They might be little things that we have forgotten about.
The Jollies is taking the time to do what gives you joy. So when I say make time for the jollies–I mean make time for what gives you “joy,”
 even if you still have loose ends in your life and your “to do” list is full. It took me a while to figure this out, but there will always be “loose ends” and uncertainty. If you always wait for the perfect time to begin something new, you will never begin. The only perfect time is now.

So there you have it—There’s only one thing left to do. Enjoy the journey and make it an exciting adventure. of discovery. This blog has been adapted from my forthcoming book, Dancing on the River, which will be released on May 1st.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released May 1, 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com

What I’ve noticed with, we’ll call him, Les in our life coaching sessions, is that Les knows it all. What i mean by that is that he knows all of the answers. He has enough knowledge for ten people but not wisdom.

You can’t obtain wisdom unless you make time for the inner work. Les has resistance to sitting down and taking time for reflection. He rather talk with others and ask them for the answers. But he keeps asking the same questions and doesn’t like what the answers are, so he asks the next person. As a result, he spends his time managing one crisis after another. This cycle never stop and it won’t unless Les sits down and gets to know himself.

He’ll blame his wife, the economy, or his genetics, among other things, for his predicament. Les is the exception. I’ve worked with many individuals who have transformed their lives. They realized that happiness is the result of a life decision to be happy in this moment that they make over and over again. They realize that there is a direct correlation with how they start day and the quality of their life. With that in mind they sit down and meditate before starting their day. I’ve seen it in my own life and with countless others.

There’s no one to blame. You are the answer.

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released May 1, 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

A familiar theme that keeps coming up with my life coaching clients is that no matter how successful they are in the world, they are not excited about their life. Not only that, but things are not the way they were. Things have changed, but they have not kept up with the new paradigm. There’s a whole set of new rules and they are unfamiliar with them. They are stuck in their comfort zones and have been complacent. What I mean by complacent is that even though things are not the way they would like them to be, they aren’t willing to take the steps to make the necessary changes.

Navigating life’s changes both personally and globally has become an art form. You have to develop life skills, not just career skills. You have to cultivate an inner life separate from what you do in the world. Living from the center is a practice that you develop over time. If you have been following me, you know about the morning program that I suggest to begin your day. After meditating, express gratitude for your life exactly the way it is and then wonder about the highlight of the day.

Try this for 30 days and see what happens. I know i am just touching upon this briefly here and will go into more detail in a future blog. You’ll find out that being happy is a reflection of a life decision that you make; to be happy in this moment of time.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released May 1, 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016