I’ve been reading Spencer Johnson’s new book Peaks and Valleys. Usually we think in terms of the highs and lows in our life or the ups and downs. It’s our emotional responses to how we react to life’s events that determine our moods. Sometimes I feel like a yoyo, my emotions being yanked all over the place. In the same day I can feel just about every emotion possible. On those days, even I when feel the dark feelings of despair, I also experience a deep sense of love and joy.

And then there are those days when I feel good inside. No matter what happens in my life, I have a smile inside. It’s that feeling of inner peace that no matter what is happening in my life, the light keeps shining.

We know that the circumstances of our life, like the weather, constantly changes. If our mood changes every time there is something new or different, our emotions will run our life.

So what can you do, that will support you in finding that sense of inner peace. As you know, quite often I have encouraged you to meditate. It’s been my path for many years. There’s one more practice you can incorporate into your life. And that is to practice Gratitude. Gratitude shifts your focus from what’s wrong or lacking in your life to what brings you joy. This practice just takes a few seconds and it doesn’t have to be complicated. Think about the little things. Think about some the qualities you like about yourself. After you meditate, focus on what you are thankful for. You might want to take some time to think about that right now.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Discipline has come easy to me. I have found that discipline has actually given me a sense of freedom. I am sure you have been in the presence of musicians who seem like they have been playing together. I have had that experience observing other musicians as well as playing with them. Quite often, someone might say to me, “How long have you been playing together?” Actually it was the first time. Why were we able to create that magic? It was the discipline practicing the scales for hours that gave us the freedom when we played our instruments. It was also working on our sound. Dancers have the same experience. All of the hours of not just learning the routines and sequences, but the hours of preparing the body to be open and flexible so that in a performance there is a grace and elegance.

And preparing for a presentation is the same way. Preparation and becoming familiar with the material goes a long way toward giving you a freedom in your delivery. The better you know the material, the more you can get into the presentation and have a certain fluidity in your delivery.

Although many people think of discipline as a form of repetition and confining, that’s what gives you that sense of freedom. Yet some people still have resistance to the concept of discipline. I have many good friends who are like that.

This is where you might want to think in terms of impeccability. Impeccability is a consciousness which not only encompasses discipline but much more. It’s a statement about who you are. It’s a state that you can grow into.

Imagine giving your word to yourself to exercise, to eat well or practice your art form. Keeping your word to yourself is powerful and takes a high level of commitment and will. But still we let down and justify it by thinking that we are not perfect and it’s ok to cut ourselves a little slack. Nothing wrong with that approach.

But imagine if you think in terms of impeccability when you don’t keep your word to yourself. Would you feel different? Would you stay on purpose? You know you would. For a moment think about how you can make that shift in your life. And how would it make a difference in your life?

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Yesterday in a life coaching session with lets call him Les, we had a discussion about the high level of stress that Les was feeling. Les is a high profile attorney. He’s very successful and is driven by what he has to do to make sure that it stays that way and to support his family in the way that he wants. Of course there are office problems that contribute to his predicament.

There is a certain frustration and hopelessness in his life. It’s like he is on a treadmill and he doesn’t see how he can get off. To add to his challenge he has two teenagers that are acting out and he has no way of controlling them. Les, like most of us, has a need to feel like he is in control of his life.

I told Les that most likely, twenty years from now, he will have many of the same concerns, unless he implements some changes in perspective now. Sure the kids will be out of the house. But he’ll still have career concerns whether or not he is in the same career.

Les needs to focus on his self-care and give it the same type of commitment that he gives to his career. Although Les intellectually realizes the importance of a self-care program, implementing it is the challenge. It’s a challenge for many of my life coaching clients. Les has to make the commitment to his self care as if it was a commitment to a client. And it’s more important.

Self-care has to become an integral aspect of your life. Meditation is at the heart of such a program. I know; I was a busy trial lawyer racing from one courtroom to the next until I got into meditation. Even though I was just as busy, I wasn’t stressed. I learned that I could be busy and relaxed.

In the next blog we’ll explore what else you can do to develop a self-care program. Think about what it means to become impeccable.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

We all have a unique way of communicating our story, a way that reflects our life experiences. The photographer uses a camera, the artist a brush, and the musician a melody or rhythm. As the years go by there is more to tell as we experience more of life. As we keep evolving we look through a different filter, paint with a different color, sing a different song or feel a different rhythm.
When you have children, June is the time for graduations. It was six years ago that my son, Josh, graduated from high school and then a few years later my daughter, Makaela, graduated. This year it is my youngest, Savanna’s turn. Graduations are symbolic of the transitions in life. In some ways we are always transitioning from one phase to another, each with its challenges and opportunities.
I think back as I eagerly await the graduation ritual. There’s always a field in the midst of a picturesque setting with mountains in the background. And then it begins. I look toward the stage. I listen with one ear to what the various speakers have to say while my mind races in overdrive. I think about how rapidly my children have changed and how I have had to let go of some of my expectations in order to stay connected to them. There’s more work to do. It was at Josh’s graduation that this message hit home. During the principle’s talk to the students and their families, she made reference to Spencer Johnson’s classic parable about change, “Who Moved My Cheese.”
It is a paradox of life that while our children change rapidly, we as adults try to put the brakes on the speed of change. We like to think to some degree we are in control of our life by holding on to what we’re used too.

“No,” Hem quickly responded. “I like it here. It’s comfortable. It’s what I know. Besides it’s dangerous out there.”
Johnson, Spencer “Who Moved My Cheese?”

Just like Hem, we have artfully crafted a comfort zone, although familiar, keeps us boxed in. That’s the way it was for me. During many periods of my life, I became attached to the way things were, resisting the changes that were necessary for me to grow. It could be a career or a relationship. I finally took that Leap of Faith and left the comfort of my law practice, ten years ago, to begin the journey that I am on now.
By making this change, I have created the breathing room that has allowed me to grow into the person I am today. Although this path has been unpredictable at times, I have learned how to navigate life’s changes. In the process of becoming an expanded person, we develop a deeper sense of who were are and a deeper sense of self. Some of these changes we intentionally create, such as my career change, while others just happen. Change is a constant process. What is challenging for some of us to accept, is that as our bodies change (just take a look at some of your old pictures) your physiology and chemistry also changes. By the time you’ve reached the wisdom years, you’ve been through many cycles. Even though these changes were not necessarily what you were expecting you have learned how to navigate these deeper waters. Although I’ve felt my share of fear and pain during some of these transitions, I’ve learned how to let go and trust that I will land on my feet. And I usually do. The letting go offers me a new experience of life…in which I experience all it, the pains, the sorrows, and the joys that gives me a newfound vitality and excitement. A life in which everyday is new, although not necessarily fun. I know I’m alive and have a deeper sense of myself. I smile and laugh again.
Perhaps Anais Nin says it best. “Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it.”
I recognize that there is a natural rhythm of life, much like the rhythm of the seasons that is constantly changing. At times we experience a stillness and at other times a quickening. There are moments when your heart feels full and then at other times you feel contracted. And then there are those moments when for no reason at all, you experience a deep sense of joy and fulfillment. Of course the other side of that is also true, when for no apparent reason, you feel a profound sadness.
When you flow with this natural rhythm and encompass it all, rather than trying to resist the aspects that you don’t want to experience, you experience an effortless quality in your life. You instinctively know what to do and life just seems to work. Life is easy…more fun…more meaningful…and less of a struggle. You are excited about getting up in the morning and feel like you have a purpose.
You probably want to know what you can do, so that you can flow with this natural rhythm. Honor the transitions. They are the catalyst for you to be with yourself Be grateful for them. Know that when you are feeling pain, that like the wind, even though it still hurts, it won’t last forever. When the winds change, and they always do, the clouds of despair lift and you experience a deeper sense of joy and meaning in the midst of this change. It could happen in a heartbeat.
Look forward to this change as opportunity, as adventure, as possibility. Accept and love those feelings and qualities about yourself that you so often try to avoid. As you look inward and take time for reflection through meditation and prayer you experience a deeper sense of inner peace. As you become more accepting of the fully integrated you, you become more accepting of your humanity. It is the acceptance of your humanity that you know we are all connected.
Let me know what is changing in your life. I love receiving your many responses and feedback. Thank you and keep them coming. Feel free to pass this letter on to the friends in your circle and let them know about the advantages of being on the journey.

Journey On

Mark

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Almost everything that I have done in my life has been a stepping stone for something greater down the road, even thought I didn’t know it at the time. Perhaps you wonder if you embarked upon a wrong path. You might even think that you are wasting your time. What does that really mean? As I have said we learn from everything.

Perhaps when comparing the past to what we know now, we might think that we could have avoided some of the steps we took and some of the wrong turns. It might have been a bad relationship or a mistake in trusting a friend. It might have been selecting the wrong major in college or a dead-end job.

There have been times in my life when I have been most productive, and times when nothing seemed to get done. Both were necessary for my growth and evolution.

I don’t think we can waste time, even though I spent a year and a half in graduated school that I can’t figure out what it contributed to my life. But when I think back I realize that it kept me out of the draft. We have know way of knowing what our ultimate destiny is. Just about everything that I have done or experienced when looking back at it comes together like an invisible web. But it’s only in looking back with hindsight that the web begins to become visible.

Trust that it’s all unfolding as it should. Everyone you meet and every experience you have is all grist for the mill. You learn from it and it contributes to who you are today – even the so-called negative things.

We keep repeating the lessons of the past until we learn them and then we are ready to move on. It took many relationships to become clear as to what I wanted in a soul-mate. With each one, I learned more about myself. That’s the purpose of our life’s experiences. With each one, we learn more about ourselves and what is important to us.

It’s a lifelong journey of discovery. Enjoy the journey. Happiness is a choice that you make each moment. And remember to smile and laugh a little bit more than yesterday.

JOURNEY ON,
MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow, JD, is an Executive and Life Coach who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former successful trial attorney for 30 years as well as a musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He also publishes Letters on Life, an inspirational ezine. To sign up, visit his website, http://www.inspirepossibility.com

In a life coaching session yesterday with let’s call her Carol we had an interesting discussion about how resistance shows up in her life.

The challenge is that resistance has many disguises, many of which we don’t recognize. There is the obvious—”avoidance.” If we are honest with ourselves, we usually are able to notice this tendency. There’s “procrastination” which is a form of avoidance.

But I’m talking about a different type of resistance–a resistance that is unconscious. It’s a resistance that prevents us from being fully present. It might show when we are a little tired and we miss what is being said or is happening in the moment…or it might show up when our mind thinks about something other than what we are doing in the moment….we’re talking with someone and we are thinking about what we have to do later. That’s the classic situation that we all find ourselves in from time to time. We’re not fully present with life.

It’s these unconscious patterns that run our lives. We also have resistance to change. Why? Because of our fear of the unknown. For example…let’s say we are stuck in a dead-end career, but it provides us financial security. If we were guaranteed a better situation, we wouldn’t hesitate to leave….it takes courage to make the changes that we need to make in our lives and face the unknown. It’s facing the unknown that is our ticket to personal freedom. In the meantime…smile and laugh a little bit more than yesterday.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. 415.453.5016 http://www.inspirepossibility.com

I just got back from my chiropractor’s office. For a long time he had been telling me that his role was to help me maintain my spinal health…that because of my age there was a stiffness that I would have to live with and as long as I wasn’t in pain there was nothing to worry about.

I have also been doing yoga for many years. Yoga has given me hope that as I age rather than becoming stiffer and less able to engage in activities, I would become more flexible and be more active no matter how old I was. And I do notice a difference. I’m more flexible than I have ever been and with each year I become more flexible.

So I have to admit that the chiropractors past prognosis was disappointing.

However today he said that he has been noticing that my spine is more flexible than its ever been and that he should have recognized what was possible with a commitment to a regular yoga practice. He said that my progress was an inspiration to him and that I have been actually reversing the aging process.

It reinforces my commitment to a regular practice. Self care is a path not a solution. It’s an evolutionary process. It’s never too late to begin the journey. Today is the first day of the rest of your life.

Smile and don’t forget to laugh a little bit more than yesterday.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. 415.453.5016 http://www.inspirepossibility.com

In a life coaching session with let’s just call him Les, I have noticed that Les continues to have a myriad of excuses why his life isn’t working. Not only does he have excuses, he has medical experts that validate his reasons for not following through.

Whenever we discuss Les’s challenge, his standard reply is that I don’t understand. Afterall, medical experts for years have agreed as to why he acts the way that he does.

Les’s conduct is predictable. I will say that even though his responses are predictable, they have a unique quality to them.

When Les asked to reschedule a missed appointment, the only time available was in the evening. Les was reluctant to commit to this time because he doesn’t like to go out in the evening. I suggested to Les that this is exactly what he needs to do….change his patterns. Try a new approach to the way he lives his life. Change his morning routine. Instead of driving somewhere close, that he ride a bike or walk to his destination.

In my own process I have found that changing routines and breaking patterns gives me a feeling of personal freedom. Fasting once or twice per year for days at a time, gets me in touch with my relationship to what I put in my body. I recently just completed a fast. I got off caffeine and dairy and haven’t gone back to it. It’s been a month. I know it won’t be forever. But stepping back and noticing what’s habitual is a great way to get out of automatic pilot and become conscious again.

In the meantime, don’t forget to smile and laugh a little bit more than yesterday.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change. 415.453.5016 http://www.inspirepossibility.com

I like to go to the movies. It’s not that often that I get totally involved with the characters. I saw The Great Buck Howard the other night. I gave it a 9. The protagonist, Troy, drops out of law school to work for Buck Howard, a mentalist. When his father finds out that he had dropped out of law school, he tries to convince him to go back. But Troy pursues his his dream and follows his heart to become a writer.

It takes courage to follow your heart. Quite often it’s not the safe thing to do and you experience the ups and downs of trying to make things work financially. But you do have the potential to experience more passion in your life. i left a safe law career to pursue the work that I am doing now. It’s been an exciting adventure and certainly has gotten me out of my comfort zone. Of course I don’t have the external security I once had. But I am on a path that keeps getting more exciting each day.

So it’s a choice that you have to make. Do you want the security of a safe career or the adventure of being a trail blazer. I have tended to be the trail blazer type, but I have also gone about it in a practical way. I like to think of myself as a practical mystic. “Reach for the sky but at the same time be grounded.” When I have the basics covered, I am more willing to step out and go for it.

How do you think about your life? Are you playing it too safe? Or perhaps you are being too foolish at times? And maybe there is a balance.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, Executive and Life Coach, Visionary Speaker and Inspirational Leader, has a unique background. Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in the fall of 2009. http://.www.inspirepossibility.com

When you feel inspired, what is possible in your life seems unlimited. You have a “can do attitude” and things that might ordinarily bother you, don’t seem to get in the way. You have a confidence and knowing that everything is going to be ok.

I am sure that most of you have experienced this state and are familiar with what i am saying. So if that’s the case, the bigger question is how do you get inspired.

I am also sure that each of us has our own strategy to get into this state of being. I have found that how I start my week goes a long way in creating the mood for the week. I have also found that having a Sunday ritual is a big element in creating this state. My week seems to go better and I have created an expectation now that this will be the case. The Sunday ritual is different for each of us.

For several years I have been going to New thought churches such as Science of Mind and Unity to give me that spark. While it is true, that sometimes I don’t find the services stimulating or inspiring, it is the time afterwards to connect with community that I enjoy. This seems to work for me. Perhaps for you it might a more traditional church. My wife, Annie has a different ritual. She goes to a regular dance class Sunday morning that gets her humming in the right mood for the rest of the day and sets the tone for the week.

I have also found that reading inspiring books in the evening before falling asleep gives me a certain sense of peace.

When we feel inspired there is less uncertainty and a knowing that you are on the right path.
And at the same time there is a feeling of “walking in freedom,” that effortless quality that you feel when life just flows.

I’m not suggesting that you completely overhaul your life. But what is one thing that you could integrate into your life, that would inspire you? What would you have to change to make this happen”

In the meantime, smile and laugh a little bit more than yesterday. And
JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, Executive and Life Coach, Visionary Speaker and Inspirational Leader, has a unique background. Throughout his life, Mark has always made a practice of taking a leap of faith whenever he heard the call for something more. His life has been an unfolding journey of discovery. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in the fall of 2009. http://.www.inspirepossibility.com