A familiar theme that keeps coming up with my life coaching clients is that no matter how successful they are in the world, they are not excited about their life. Not only that, but things are not the way they were. Things have changed, but they have not kept up with the new paradigm. There’s a whole set of new rules and they are unfamiliar with them. They are stuck in their comfort zones and have been complacent. What I mean by complacent is that even though things are not the way they would like them to be, they aren’t willing to take the steps to make the necessary changes.

Navigating life’s changes both personally and globally has become an art form. You have to develop life skills, not just career skills. You have to cultivate an inner life separate from what you do in the world. Living from the center is a practice that you develop over time. If you have been following me, you know about the morning program that I suggest to begin your day. After meditating, express gratitude for your life exactly the way it is and then wonder about the highlight of the day.

Try this for 30 days and see what happens. I know i am just touching upon this briefly here and will go into more detail in a future blog. You’ll find out that being happy is a reflection of a life decision that you make; to be happy in this moment of time.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released May 1, 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

We live in an increasingly changing world. Navigating life’s changes has become an art form. We don’t know where to turn. What seemed to work at one time, no longer works. So when I received the invitation I was excited. It was a long time coming. My good friend and fellow blogger,Warren Strudwick, http://the peacemeal project.wordpress.com, launched this new movement that people can participate in all over the world. As he wrote on his blog: “The first official Peacemeal was held at my house on December 13, about one month ago. I had invited about 25 friends who I have known from various times of my life. Twenty -two people joined me to celebrate peace on what turned out to be a pleasant Thursday evening. It was a wonderful experience.

For a few moments, we all were able to leave behind our day-to-day lives and routines, convening in a very congenial and intimate atmosphere to address our mutual need for a peace existence.

We started at about 6:30, gathering first to talk and mingle and generally to get to know each other. It was interesting to see people from varied backgrounds interacting on first encounter in such an intimate way. We then convened in my living room to discuss (as a group and individually) what peace meant to each of us. Each person was given space, as we went around the room to speak. Most us spoke directly from the heart, and this eclectic group of people proved, altogether, very special.

Each person communicated a thirst to express their inner thoughts about the role of peace and love in their lives. It would almost be a cliché to say that the energy in the room was so almost overwhelmingly positive through this open and very honest communication. The desire for peace, especially inner peace hovered in the magnetic stillness of the room.

By the time we sat to eat our meal, it was clear the most of us wanted the same happiness and inner peace in our lives. It made me think that even as we go about our daily lives oblivious, it is clear that nearly everyone is seeking some sort or peaceful existence. And if given an opportunity, people want to express and share that desire. It is a human condition. And as we share our desire, it becomes more evident that we all want to live peacefully.

This is our world. We will make it in our image. Peace. Morsel by morsel.”

Join in the movement. Have your own dinner. To find out more about peacemeal go to their blog, http://thepeacemealproject.wordpress.com

Mark Susnow, is an executive and life coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former trial attorney for 30 years, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released May 1, 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

in a life coaching session yesterday, i discussed with let’s call him Carl, the importance of having a dream that is independent from what you do in the world. For Carl and many others, the stress and demands from meeting our financial and personal obligations takes most of our energy. We don’t have much left over.

To have a dream that demands more of us and doesn’t help us meet our bottom line, at times seems unrealistic. But that’s exactly what we need to do. Otherwise we are subject to the ups and downs of the external world; our relationships, health, and finances. Carl and many others that I work with as their life coach would like to see peace in the world. Carl is in the process of starting a community of people who focus on inner peace in themselves and in the world.

But he has found much resistance in trying to bring people together. I remember at one time in my life I was faced with the same dilemma. I wrote back then, “Should the visionairies of peace stop loving, then the prophets of doom, will have their day of gloom.” Whatever our dream, we need to keep it alive. Noone else will do it for us. Sometimes just having the dream is enough. As Martin Luther King said, “I might not get to the mountaintop with you,” but he had the dream for others to believe in. Keep the dream alive. There might not be much agreement, right now.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

I have noticed that with some people that I work with as their life coach, their changes are dramatic. They’re not the same person they were when we began our work together.

They have more self-confidence and are excited about the future, but in the back of their mind, they remember that in the past when things started to go well, they sabotaged themselves. Things fell apart and they are now waiting for that to happen again.

It doesn’t have to happen. Once you go through the gate to a new way of thinking, you’ll never go back. That’s what happens when you are on a spiritual path…you are awake and aware of things that previously you were not conscious of.

You can’t go backwards. It’s too late, which is a good thing. I remember when I first began walking on the path of awakening there were times when I wish things were not so clear. I couldn’t deceive myself. I had to take responsibility for my life and could no longer blame others or circumstances, like my parents or what happened as a child.

I remember some people would say, “Ignorance is Bliss.” Once you know the truth you realize that “Ignorance is just Ignorance.” There’s no reason to try to glorify it.

The good news is that as you go forward from here, you’ll have more choices and possibilities to live a more fulfilling and successful life. You won’t go backwards even if you wanted to. On some level you are forever changed.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

If only they would be more reasonable. You probably have said this over a hundred times. Maybe you have said this version. “If only they were easier to deal with.” That’s what we discussed on a call today.

After exploring numerous approaches to make the situation better nothing seemed to change. The other person stayed in their unreasonable mode…or at least that’s the way you saw it.

Perhaps it’s a situation with a past spouse regarding the welfare of your children or it could be with a coworker. The other person in your mind seems to be unreasonable; perhaps even pathologically so. You’ve tried everything. You are frustrated. You want them to change.

I’ve been there countless times. They won’t change unless you change first. Be the example. Don’t go to their level. This is such a common situation. Your challenge….don’t get plugged into their stuff. Since they won’t change, your only choice is to change how you react to them. And over time the dynamic will be different.

Most important is not to take what’s happening personally. When I was a trial lawyer, there were many times when I had to step back from the fray and be the observer. Actually noticing myself interacting with the other attorney. Over time I realized that I had a choice not to get plugged in.

Ask yourself how you want to feel after the interaction. You can be assertive without losing your cool. But there is a fine line that once you cross, your blood pressure starts to rise and you are in the middle of a confrontation. Visualize yourself in control as the interaction in progresses. What I mean control is to be in control of your emotions. That is a choice.

JOURNEY ON

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Navigating Life’s Changes will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

In a life coaching session this morning with let’s call her Sally, a professional and mother, we discussed her tendency to react negatively when clients called her. Sally isn’t the only one. Many clients I work with often have a feeling of dread that comes and go more than they like. When that phone rings they think to themselves, “What now?”

Sally and other clients and I am sure many of you reading this blog tend to overreact to everyday events. It’s like we are waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I reminded Sally that she is in a service profession. Service professionals are there to serve others. However with the demands of running it as a business, they forget why they are in the business in the first place. They want to make a difference.

I suggested to Sally that whenever she gets a phone call during the day that she ask herself, “How can I serve this client?” And to be grateful for the call. Without that call and the call from others she wouldn’t be able to stay in business.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

In a life coaching session with let’s call her Sally, we discussed the way that she perceived herself. When I first began working with her, she was in the process of buying a professional practice. Sally did not think of herself as a confident person. Each day was an emotional struggle for her.

As we continued our work together, Sally became more comfortable with her new practice and the uncertainty that surrounded it.

It’s a fact of life that there will always be uncertainty to some extent. We’re human and have insecurities that have been with us most of our lives.

In the process of self discovery these tendencies diminish.

In our work together, there was a turning point for Sally. We talked about the courage that it took for a 50 year old woman to buy a professional practice. it took a leap of faith by someone who was willing to go for it and had a strong belief in themselves, even with the insecurities.

I asked Sally to start thinking about herself as the type of person who is willing to go for it. As she began to focus on the inner qualities that are necessary to go for it, she began to see herself as a self-confident person and became more comfortable with the uncertainty that the future might hold.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

Today I was thinking about conflict and the many emotions associated with it. First there is the disagreement. Your view is not in alignment with the other persons. You don’t like it. Your body tightens and your breathing becomes shallow.

Then there is the venting phase which involves making the other person wrong. You feel hurt and have a need to be vindicated. In your mind you make the other person wrong a thousand times and gather support for your viewpoint. You process it with other people until finally they don’t want to hear it anymore.

And then there is the letting go. You no longer have the need to talk about it. You become quiet and let it go. You become detached from the outcome. And as you become quieter, the conflict goes away.

Today I felt at peace with a current business conflict I was having. As I found the peace within myself, the conflict didn’t bother me any more. And then I ran into an old friend who I hadn’t seen in many years. I no longer was carrying the baggage of the prior conflict. I could be totally in the present and maintained my inner peace and enjoyed the day.

Journey On

Mark

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

It works. It’s easy to find an hour to do anything. What this means is that you can complete major projects without altering your schedule. Just knowing this gets rid of a lot of stress. First estimate how long you think the particular project will take. Let’s say five hours. Then schedule it into your appointment book. Then it’s a matter of honoring what’s in your appointment book. It seems that when we write something down it has more significance…It makes it more real.

Here’s another way to look at it. Think about all the things you are “good at” or perhaps were “good at”. All of them required practice and commitment. Big projects are nothing more than a bunch of little ones. A movie is really hundreds of stills moving at an accelerated pace.

Part of living in this day and age is to slow down the pace. So the movie of your life is nothing more than just a series of moments. And as you become more focused on these moments rather than the future you’ll be less stressed out. You’ll enjoy what you’re doing more and less concerned what will happen down the road.

So slow it down and enjoy the moment. The one hour formula is a good start. As you are consistent with this practice your life will be dramatically different.
JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016

It has become increasingly clear to me that the way to transform your mundane everyday life into a playground of fun and opportunity is to change the way you are throughout the day. The fact that I am and thousands of others are blogging and thousands are reading our blogs speaks to the fact that just about everyone is tied to their computer speaks for itself. How many times a day do you check your email? I notice with my business that people contact me via email rather than using the phone. I find myself doing this also.

What happened to the old fashioned way of greeting each other when we smiled and asked each other how we were? It is true that often this was also mechanical but it’s time to reverse the trend and take time again for each other. Too many of us have lost the ability to engage in a warm conversation. Too many of us couldn’t connect with others even if our lives depended on it. We don’t make the effort. Real communication is an art and process.

Let’s make a start. I have an idea and a challenge. For the next week your job is to get one person a day to smile. If that is too easy then step it up to two and then perhaps three. Let me know how you do. Also 25 smiles per day on your part goes a long way. Think of all the facial muscles you’ll activate. And the neurons connecting the muscles to the brain release those good endorphins.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

Mark Susnow, an executive and life coach, inspires others to experience more fulfillment and success in their life. A former trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. Whether coaching one-on-one, speaking to groups, or leading a retreat, he shares his message that regardless of our life’s circumstances, we can find more joy and meaning in our life. He is a sought after speaker and coauthor along with Zig Ziglar and Brian Tracy and other experts in the book 101 Great Ways to Improve your Life. Mark’s new book, Dancing on the River…Finding Joy and Meaning in the Midst of Change will be released in early 2010. mark@inspirepossibility.com 415.453.5016