Archive for August, 2008

WEED YOUR GARDEN

Wednesday, August 13th, 2008

So here it is. It’s the middle of August. I’m back in Marin but only for a few days before heading off to a wedding in Minnesota. What a change of pace.

Back in Marin I notice the growth of the new plants that I planted earlier in the summer. The garden hadn’t been tended to in years. We weeded, prepared the soil, researched which plants would do well in our climate and planted. While away I thought about the garden and wondered how the plants would do. While most of the plants seemed to like their new home, some didn’t make it through the summer. It didn’t seem like there was a pattern. One fern thrives while the other only a few feet away, struggles. Isn’t that the way life is? In some areas of our life we thrive while in others we struggle.

We have natural inclinations…natural strengths. Music has always been one of my natural inclinations while fixing things has been a challenge. And yet on those rare occasions when I do fix something I get excited.

Relationships are like that. I look at the people in my life. There are those who I am connected with that put a smile on my face. And then there are those who are a lot of work.
It’s a matter of how we want to spend our time. I think back to my garden. In one area of the garden there are very few weeds and in another area, I am constantly weeding.

Until I get rid of the weeds, what I can see and appreciate is limited. In our lives, the weeds which are in the form of limiting beliefs, prevent us from seeing what is possible.

Weed your garden. Take the time to get rid of what isn’t working.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow,JD, is an Executive and Life Coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former successful trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He also publishes, Letters on Life, an inspirational ezine. Signup! http://www.inspirepossibility.com

MESSAGE TO A LOVED ONE

Wednesday, August 6th, 2008

I’m doing something a little different in this blog. What do you want people to know about life, long after you are gone? It might be your son or daughter or a friend that you really care about. My message is in the form of a letter.
DEAR LOVED ONES:

I KNOW THAT SOMEWHERE YOU CAN HEAR ME. I WANT TO LET YOU KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU.

I HAVE A LOT TO TELL YOU. BUT I WANT TO LEAVE YOU WITH ONE THOUGHT THAT YOU SHOULD NEVER FORGET.

YOU CAN BE HAPPY AND FULFILLED. IT MIGHT NOT SEEM THAT WAY AT TIMES. KEEP ASKING QUESTIONS ABOUT HOW YOU CAN DO THIS. SOMETIMES IT SEEMS EASY AND THEN IT CHANGES. YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT LIFE CHANGES. THINGS DON’T STAY THE SAME. SO YOU HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO BE FLEXIBLE. HAVE A SPIRITUAL PATH, SOMETHING THAT YOU SPEND SOME TIME WITH EVERYDAY. OTHEWISE YOU’LL GET TOO CAUGHT UP IN THE DAY-TO-DAY SUPERFICIALITY OF LIFE.

DON’T FORGET TO LAUGH…EVEN IN THOSE MOMENTS OF PAIN AND SORROW, THERE IS JOY AND LAUGHTER ON THE OTHER SIDE. SO DON’T GIVE UP…KEEP GOING FOR IT AND REMEMBER THERE ARE NO FREE LUNCHES. YOU ARE GOING TO GET YOUR SHARE OF LUMPS. BUT IT’S WHAT YOU DO WITH THEM THAT ULTIMATLEY DETERMINES THE QUALITY OF YOUR LIFE.

HERE’S TO THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

WITH LOVE AND BLESSINGS

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow,JD, is an Executive and Life Coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former successful trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He also publishes, Letters on Life, an inspirational ezine. Signup! http://www.inspirepossibility.com

KINDRED SOULS

Tuesday, August 5th, 2008

Sometimes telling a story is the best way to say it. There was that moment. My heart was wide open. I felt inspired. Take a second and imagine that this story is about you.

“You’re on the way to the airport. You get on the plane with a book that you’ve been planning to read for quite some time. As you open your book, you glance at the person next to you. A few minutes later you are asked a question and you reluctantly answer. You lower your book a bit to be polite and after a few minutes you find yourself putting your book down and engaging in a conversation, although with a lack of enthusiasm. And then the person next to you, let’s call him John, makes an observation about you that’s quite perceptive and sensitive. You start to become curious about who John is and in the course of the conversation, he tells you of an experience he has only shared with a few people. You let John know that you have had a similar experience. By now you’re totally engaged and listening to every word he says. You notice every nuance in the inflection of his voice and the way he moves. Time seems to stand still and the next thing you know the plane lands. You say goodbye to the kindred soul you have just met.”

You now know what’s possible. We all would love to have these experiences more often. You feel heard and everything seems possible. It is communication at its highest level and is a lost art. When you integrate four fundamental truths of communication into your life, you can have these experiences more often.
The first truth is to know that what we all want on a deeper level is the ability to connect with another, to touch each other’s soul. Unfortunately, too many of our conversations are just an exchange of ideas and information and we very rarely penetrate the surface. Most of our focus is on how we are going to respond to what is being said instead of listening. When we know that what the other person really wants is connection, there is common ground to build upon. With this foundation, we can build relationships that deepen and empower those involved.
The second truth is to know that listening involves much more than just listening to the words. It is tuning into the energy beyond the words. It is understanding the needs and feelings of the other person. It is about being totally engaged and at the same time being in the rhythm of life. Yes, it takes a lot of energy but you will be energized by what you get back. Imagine living in a world where you are truly listening and fully engaged.
The third truth is to know that you must take responsibility for the quality of your communication. Because we all have long standing attitudes and beliefs we sometimes find ourselves trying to convince the other person of our viewpoints. Being right then becomes the goal of the interaction rather than communication and the next thing you know you are in a full-fledged argument. Just think of what happens when you discuss politics or religion. Is being right more important than experiencing one of those magical moments?
The fourth truth is that communication is a process and an art. Being a masterful communicator doesn’t happen over night but it starts with the intention to experience more connection in your busy life. Just like other art forms, i.e. dancing or music, there is a natural ebb and flow in the learning cycle. As your commitment deepens to this process you notice that you are experiencing frequent glimpses of the magic that is possible in your life. The ultimate communication occurs when you are able to touch each other’s soul and share who you are. This new found magic then becomes the gateway to a more fulfilling life.
At our core, we all have the same human needs and desires. We want to know that we matter and that our life has meaning and purpose. We have the need to love and to be loved. When we accept that we all have the same human needs and desires, we know that we are part of one human family. By working together as one, what is possible in our lives, communities, and the world expands. That’s when we know that we are all kindred souls.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow,JD, is an Executive and Life Coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former successful trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He also publishes, Letters on Life, an inspirational ezine. Signup! http://www.inspirepossibility.com

HOW DO YOU FEEL AFTERWARDS?

Sunday, August 3rd, 2008

The birthday boy. That’s what I feel like. It was my birthday yesterday and today we’re having a celebration.

Getting together with old friends…food….music…and new friends.

So who do you want to be with on your birthday? What is it about them that makes you want to share this time with them?

Think about this person…what would it be like if you spent more time with them on a regular basis?

From time to time I reassess my relationships. Why am I in a particular relationship? That’s what we need to think about. Who are we spending our time with? How do we feel afterwards? When you feel empowered afterwards is a pretty good indication of whether you’re in a healthy relationship.

I am always open to making new friends and deepening the relationships that have been going on for a while. And also willing to recognize that it’s time to move on.

JOURNEY ON

MARK

JOURNEY ON is a blog dedicated to personal and professional development. Mark Susnow,JD, is an Executive and Life Coach, who inspires others to believe in themselves. A former successful trial attorney for 30 years and musician, he integrates what it takes to be successful in the world with the inner wisdom unfolded to him through years of yoga and meditation. He also publishes, Letters on Life, an inspirational ezine. Signup! http://www.inspirepossibility.com


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